Tuesday, November 19, 2013

The Politeness Pig

I would like to introduce you to newest member of my family, Politeness.


That's right, he's a pig! Because that is what my children are when they eat, pigs. I have tried to encourage some manners at the table, but nothing was working. My kids were licking pans, farting at the table, eating with their fingers and all sorts of loveliness. 

Politeness the Pig has stepped in to teach my feral children some manners. If Politeness catches you having bad manners he comes and sits in front of you while you are eating. Whoever ends up with him at the end of dinner gets an extra kitchen chore. I try to make it an awful one, because that is how I roll.

One of my little piglet darlings was given the pig at a meal, so he figured he didn't need to bother with ANY manners because he already had the pig. So as a fun surprise I started to add a chore for each offense; he quickly stopped his bad manners.

Some ways to earn this little pig include the following:

Licking pans (seriously, who licks pans?)
Licking your plate
Eating with your fingers
Trying to eat a large piece of food without cutting it up
Talking with your mouth full
Farting
Burping
Being a loud mouth schmuck
And any general rudeness

So far it seems to be working, I like Politeness because he is the bad guy, not mom and dad. The kids like to pretend Politeness is watching them, which is funny, but then I found this picture on my phone...

Which is creepy.

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